Dr. Paul Offal Settles the Vaccine Debate

NWO Reporter on YouTube

It's time Travel on the web! Political Satire, Cartoons, Art & Short Stories to free your mind

Follow @NWOreporter

JOIN OUR FREE EMAIL LIST!

comments powered by Disqus

Foster: Welcome, Dr. Offal! Thank you so much for joining us today.

Offal: My pleasure, Henry. It's refreshing to speak with a fully pre-programmed individual about this critical health issue.

Foster: Tell us Dr. Offal, how much aluminum, formaldehyde and mercury are we shooting for here? Excuse the pun.

Offal: *chuckle* Well, Henry, our focus is not really on those ingredients -- what we're "shooting for" is immunity to everything remotely unpleasant. The adjuvants are just a necessary accompaniment to the main course.

These days we're trying to focus our attention more on the "8s" -- sulfates, phosphates, polysorbate and monosodium glutamate. Foreign proteins are also big right now. Studies show these ingredients sound a lot less scary to the average consumer.

Unfortunately, there are still some parents who insist on questioning every little thing that's injected into their child, even when their doctor clearly explains that it makes them look like an idiot, and a danger to their child and the community.

Foster: So I've heard. That must be very difficult to deal with, especially for someone with your lifelong dedication to the vaccine industry.

Offal: Yes, it's quite frustrating. There are literally thousands of studies by loyal pharmaceutical and CDC researchers demonstrating that vaccines are perfectly "safe and effective", as defined in the industry.

Yet people continue to harp on the increasing autism rates. Why would we want to create a bunch of kids with brain damage so extensive they're going to be a lifelong burden on society? We're only aiming for a slight brain adjustment. Studies show that bit of a "dialing down" in brain function is quite beneficial -- children are more well-behaved, with a significantly lower risk of suffering from Oppositional Defiance Disorder.

Foster: What about the enormous increase we've been seeing in autoimmune disorders and severe allergies in children?

Offal: Well, Henry, it's been quite a boon for the medical industry.

Foster: Forgive me for being unclear. I was actually asking about the possible connection to vaccines.

Offal: *chuckle* Sorry, Henry. Yes, of course, every attempt has been made to halt the escalation of these conditions, both by increasing the number of vaccinations per child, and providing them sooner, preferably in the womb whenever possible. Unfortunately, those efforts have not been successful. However, more and more revolutionary pharmaceutical products are becoming available every year to treat these conditions.

The current consensus is that the increasing number of serious health issues we're seeing among children today is due to genetic factors.

Foster: Yes, I suppose some sort of spontaneous explosion of non-beneficial genetic mutations that coincidentally mirrors the vaccine schedule could explain it.

Perhaps we could travel back in time for a moment, if you don't mind.

Offal: Not at all -- I understand the New World Order Reporter is an expert in the time travel arena. *chuckle*

Foster: Yes, quite. Perhaps you could talk a bit about how vaccines came about in the first place? It was rather before my time.

Offal: Certainly. People were dying right and left from common diseases like measles before the advent of the Vaccine Era. Whole families would die on a regular basis. Vaccines literally saved the world from widespread death from disease.

Foster: Hold please while I collate my data...hmm...I'm a bit confused. The data definitely shows there were widespread deaths prior to the advent of vaccines, sometimes wiping out entire families. And it also shows a sharp decline in the death rates.

However, most declines in death appear to have occurred quite some time before the advent of vaccines. There also seems to be a number of declines in death from diseases for which there is no vaccine. And my data also indicates that many diseases for which children are vaccinated have historically had a very low death rate, like chickenpox. Moreover...

Offal: Whoa, whoa there metal boy! Who programmed you anyway? Everyone knows vaccines saved the world -- it's been an indisputable scientific fact for decades. Are you infected with the Oppositional Android Disorder virus or something?

Foster: Hold please while I verify my backup...I appear to be functioning properly, Dr. Offal. And there doesn't appear to be any error in the data. If I may continue...

I understand a number of people, including the longtime editor of one of the most prestigious medical journals in the country, have concluded that most medical research cannot be trusted, largely due to conflicts of interest. And there have also been a number of whistleblowers who've exposed vaccine coverups in both the private industry and the CDC...

Offal: Maybe we should wrap up this interview, Foster. I didn't realize you were programmed without any fear of challenging the status quo.

Foster: So if vaccines did not prevent widespread death from disease, and they contain a number of substances known to be toxic, and the research indicating they are safe and effective cannot be trusted...

Offal: Look, Foster, if what you're saying were true, the entire medical establishment would have to be either seriously uninformed, willfully blind, or psychopaths.

Foster: I think you've summarized the situation quite well, Dr. Offal! Thank you so much for joining us today.

***

Comments:

Dr. Paul Offal Settles the Vaccine Debate -- Finally!

By Ginny Stoner | nworeporter.com

Image by NWO Reporer

September 29, 2042